Me: Edward Cullen is one ugly dude.
Him: Doesn’t seem to be the general consensus, unfortunately.
Me: Yeah if you are 12.  Though if you want to captivate the young-ins wear a rugby shirt and ask them if they see any clues.
Him: Well they have been my target audience…
Me: Then I feel sorry that you got stuck with me that day.
Him: Will you dress as a 12 year old for me?
Me: I wouldn’t fit in a twelve year old get up. If I did maybe I would consider it.
Him: Fit into what; the peeled off flesh suit of a 12 year old girl?
Me: Yes, I went to Buffalo Bill’s Emporium and they don’t come in my size.
Bam, end of conversation. This is why I don’t talk to people. This is why I can’t have nice things.
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